Momma's Birthday

Yesterday was my Momma's birthday.  We all went over to my grandparents house to eat dinner.  I love when all of us get together. Non stop story telling and laughter.  I must tell this story because it's too funny not to tell....
 My friend, Brian, had met most of my family last weekend at a friend of mine's wedding, he had not met my grandfather, Jack, yet.  As we were driving to my grandparents house I tried to warn him.  I told him we were loud and what you see is what you get.  Brian has a really good personality and is always making me laugh, so I knew he would fit in well with us. He had said he was going to mess with my Mom and had come up with this elaborate story to tell her.   We were the last ones to get to my grandparents house.  Everyone else was there: Momma, Daddy, Erika (sister), Joshua (brother-in-law), Jackson (nephew), Granny, and Jack.  Well, when we walked in Jack looked like a deer in headlights scared to death and everyone else was dying laughing.  I had no clue what was going on.  Brian went up to my grandfather to shake his hand and Jack wouldn't let his hand go.  Apparently, my wonderful, pot stirring, brother-in-law, had told Jack that Brian was an ex-convict and that he had just gotten out of prison for murdering someone, theft, and a couple of other things.  Brian started going along with it.  My poor grandfather looked like he was about to have a heart attack.  That got our night off to a great start.  He finally told my grandfather that he was not a ex-convict and that he had nothing to worry about.  He wasn't there to steal anything from their house haha.  I love my family.  We hold nothing back.  My Mom and sister entertained poor Brian all night with hilarious stories from when we were kids and not to mention, Jackson running around pretending to be Spider-Man and shooting everyone with his spider webs.

Brian, I'm glad you came to spend the evening with my family and are getting to know everyone.  I'm also glad that you didn't head for the hills last night too. :)

My Daddy on the other hand did not have such a great day/night.  He had his bone marrow shot Friday.  The nurse did say that this may not make him feel well. It did not hit him till yesterday.  My poor Daddy looked so worn out, just plain exhausted.  I hate seeing him like that.  I'm not really sure how much I can handle seeing him this way.  That is not my Daddy.  My Daddy is the one also telling stories and laughing with us.  He's the one watching my sister and I act like we are still 10 years old running around the house chasing each other (I'm sure thinking what in the world have I raised haha)  He's the one telling us that's why Jackson acts the way he does.  He just wasn't himself last night.  If I could change one thing from last night and from now on, it would be that my Daddy does not have cancer.  I know that I cannot do that.  I hate seeing him down and out like he was last night, but I am thankful that he is still here to celebrate special occasions with us.

Thank you God for such an amazing night last night with my family.  Thank you for letting me have happy memories that I can share.  Thank you for such an awesome family.  Thank you for giving me each and everyday I get to spend with my family and friends.  Thank you for FINALLY letting someone come in my life that I share my family with and that makes me as happy as Brian does.  Thank you for such an amazing, wonderful, Mom I get to celebrate with.

I am trying my hardest and best to continue to look on the bright side of everything.  Even though Daddy didn't feel good last night he was still there, with my whole family, and that's all that matters.

Happy Birthday to greatest Mother in the entire world, the glue that holds our family together.  The woman who is so strong and holds her head high, no matter what life throws at her.  Truly blessed to be able to call her Momma and to have her in my life.
I love you, Momma.  Happy Birthday XOXO Sissy

My Best Friend

I'm dedicating this post to my very best and dearest friend of mine Jessica.  We have been friends since we were in 2nd grade. I would not just call her my best friend, I claim her to be part of my family. (She has pretty much had to almost give me her last name because I'm with her family so much)  We have been through so much over the past couple of years.  Lots and lots and lots of happy times and a couple of hard times.  Jessica is the one person I know I can always call no matter what time and she will be there for me.  I would, have, and will continue to do the exact same thing for her.  I can tell her anything and she is never surprised by what comes out of my mouth and always supports me in whatever decision I make and never judges me.  I have called her mid panic attack and she has had to calm me down.  She has seen me at my absolute lowest and seen me when I was on top of the world. No matter what is going on in my life she has and is always there for me.

Jessica is one the most amazing people I know.  She is the best Mom to two of the cutest little boys in the whole world and is a wonderful wife to a great man, Clint.  She has such a funny, caring, and loving personality.  She is so creative and crafty.  I could go on and on and on about how awesome I think she is. I am truly blessed to be able to call her my very best friend.

Why I love them!

2 of my very best friends

Why I love her!

                    

                                                      Jessica & Clint's sweet boys!

 Jessica,
I cannot thank you enough for everything you do for me.  You truly are more than just a best friend to me.  I do not know what I would without you.  I know you say you're always at a loss for words, but simply listening, laughing, or crying with me means the absolute world to me. I am so lucky that I have been able to share so many things in my life with you and have ALWAYS had you here to support me.  God truly blessed me with the best friend a girl could ever ask for. I know that I can always be myself around you and never have to worry what you're thinking.  (Which most of the time I'm sure it's why in the world am I friends with this crazy girl haha) Thank you for being my best friend, my therapist, my comedian, my shoulder to cry on, my person I can vent to, my sister, my other momma & daughter (inside joke).  Thank you for always welcoming me into your family and letting them be in my life.  I love you, your husband, and your boys very much and glad that I've gotten to be here and watch your family grow.  I love you dearly.  Thank you a thousand times for always being here for me!
                                        XOXO,
                                         Jams

Weekend

I have had one of the best weeks/weekends.  I can honestly say that I have some of the best friends a girl could ever ask for.  My week didn't start off that great though.  I had early duty all this week so I had to be at school by 8 am.  Well, when I was ready to leave Wednesday morning I went out to my car and it wouldn't start.  This is when my mind started going crazy.  I ALWAYS call my Daddy when something goes wrong with my car.  Well knowing that he was starting chemo the next day got me to panicking.  I'm thinking right now, yes he can fix my car, but what am I going to do when he is sick?  Who is going to take care of me? Who am I going to call?  Because no one is going to drop everything they're doing to come pick me up or work on my car like him. Well... He fixed my car like he always does and went on with his day.
 The next day was chemo.  I had prepared myself for the worst.  I had prepared myself for him to be extremely sick and not himself.  I woke that morning telling myself I wasn't going to think about anything I was going to work and going wait for the text or phone call from my mom telling how awful he felt.  When I got to school walked into my classroom I found this....

The girls I work with gave my these beautiful tulips and a card they had all signed telling me they were all here for me and everyone is praying.  Have I mentioned I work with some of the best girls ever? If not I will say it again, I work with the BEST girls ever!  I love being around them, they are such an awesome support system and so much fun to be around.  We always have so much fun together.  We were in Fall Break mode Thursday.  That afternoon, 3:45 couldn't come soon enough.  So in the spirit of celebrating & getting geared up for 2 days off we made this.... Ya'll don't kill me for posting this! :)

Friday, I went to Memphis with Daddy to get his bone marrow shot.  He was feeling great.  Drove me all the way to Memphis.  We ate lunch at Chili's.  He ate really good.  Then we went and test drove cars.  (I'm in desperate need or maybe WANT of a new car) I had such a great day with him.  He did make me drive him around Memphis.  He said he needed to see how well I drove because when, and if, he gets too sick he wants to know who he can call and who he can stand to ride with.  He also told me that he felt good enough he could jump out of the truck if I did bad and that I'd be taken off the "To Call List" haha.  

I also discovered who I take my parking from.  I've had so many take pictures of my car parked in parking lots and send me pictures telling me I can't park.  I have come to conclusion that how you park is hereditary 

Our Motto: If we're between the lines then that is all that matters.  

Friday night I went out to dinner with 2 of my very best friends, Jessica & Ashley.  I have been friends with these girls since I was elementary school.  We use to call ourselves "JAJ" I could tell so many stories of us three together but I'm not sure they would appreciate it.  Haha.  We ate dinner and came back to my house to have game night.  I have not laughed so hard in a long time.  We played a game called "Quelf"  we had so much fun.  I'm so very lucky and blessed to have these girls in my life.

I would post the video of the game we played but I'm going to save that for my next post! I had so much fun with you girls! Thank you for everything and always being there with me through thick and thin! XOXO

Last night, I went over to a friend of mines house, Me and his daughter, Blaise, carved and painted pumpkins.  We had so much fun.  This would be Mine & Brian's 3rd time to carve and paint pumpkins.  We decorated pumpkins with my nephew Jackson last weekend too.  So to say that we have become professional pumpkin carvers (I carved way more than him) would be a huge understatement.  Brian's main job was to cut open the pumpkin and clean it out.  I get most of the credit for the awesome carving skills.  (I can so say this because it's my blog and he can't defend himself hahaha -Just Sayin) 

Pumpkin carved last weekend.  I don't have any pictures of our others ones lit up. That's on the to do list!

What letter comes after Q?  Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Jackson had a little Captain in him. 

Mine & Blaise's matching pumpkins.  Pretty cute huh?

Peace sign I free handed.  Not too shabby!

They both painted their hands while painting their pumpkins! 

Please keep praying for my Daddy he has had a great weekend and hasn't eased up yet.  Still running around just like he was before.  Hope and pray that he keeps it up.  

Late Night Thoughts

My mind & thoughts are going ninety to nothing right now, so if this post seems all over place, well, it's because it is.  Bare with me.

I often wonder how and why people get cancer.  There are so many people in this world who have never done anything wrong and get cancer.  Why?  There are people in this world who are horrible, terrible, awful people who don't follow the Lord or pray or go to Church, why don't they get cancer?  I know and believe that God has his hand in this.

I have felt for the past year (before my Dad was diagnosed) that God has been trying to teach or show me something, I just haven't been able to figure out what.  I know he will reveal it to me in time, but it has been a long hard road. I feel like every time I get my head above water and things start going good for me I get knocked back down again.  So last Tuesday was a huge blow for me.  I feel like I'm drowning, screaming for help, and no one can hear me.  I know that I have an awesome family and friends to help me, but everyone has their own lives and their own things to worry about.  It's hard to ask for help.  (That pride of mine sometimes gets in the way)

I know that I cannot worry or be anxious about anything, but that is so much easier said than done.  I am a worrier.  I am an anxious person.  It is in me, it's how I've always been.  I try to stay calm and not let things bother me, but I do.  I pray for God to take it away and ask for patience and all I do is feel like he tests me.  I just keep reminding myself that this is God's plan.  He IS going to be here with me and my family down this long road.  He does have a purpose for everything that has happened in my life this past year and why my Daddy has such a nasty ugly thing as cancer.  He will show me.  He has and will always be there for me, I just have to keep my faith.

A friend of mine gave me this Bible verse last week.  It is something I have been reflecting on.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

I just pray God will open my eyes and clear my heart.  To help me be able to cast all of my anxieties  and fears on him and leave them with.  

Everything Can Change in the Blink of an Eye

I have decided to start blogging again.  I have a lot of things going on in my life right now and I would like to remember these things in years to come.  So here goes nothing... Again.

My name is Jamison; I am a daughter, sister, granddaughter, aunt, sister-in-law, friend, and teacher.  I enjoy my job, have some of the best friends a girl could ever ask for, and my family is amazing. 

A couple of weeks ago I would have probably told you I have the best life ever.  I bought a house last November, by myself, which was a huge accomplishment at 24.  I have been here for a year and have gotten finally use to living on my own (besides my dog, Coy). I have a wonderful new job and work with great girls.  Everything was amazing. Then, last week my whole world was turned upside down.  Tuesday, October 9, 2012, my Daddy was diagnosed with lung cancer. I have known people who have had cancer but no one so close to me, no one as special to me as my Daddy.  It absolutely broke my heart when I found out.  This is a man who has always been there for me.  A man who never missed a football game when I cheered in High School.  A man who I talk to about anything, who I sit under the pear tree with, share a beer with, and simply talk about life with.  A man who is strong.  This man is not only an amazing person but he is MY DADDY.  I cannot imagine anything ever happening to him. So for me to hear that he has lung cancer was like someone punching me in my gut.  Right now I want to remember how I feel about all of this and want to document important things, happy things, and even sad heart breaking things, that are happening in my family's lives.

I am so very blessed to have such a strong support system, my mother & my sister. I love my mom with all my heart.  She has and will always be there for me, my sister, and my dad no matter what.  She is one of the strongest people I know.  She never lets anything get her down.  She is always prepared. She told me the other day I needed to suck it up and stop crying.  That we had to get ready for a tough road ahead of us and crying wasn't going to get us too far.  (Which is true, but still hard to do)  My family knows I don't deal with stress well.  I told my Daddy a couple of times while he was in the hospital last week that his nurses may need to get me a bed next to him (haha) But needless to say, I'm very blessed to able to call her Mom and lucky to have her.  

My sister also keeps me grounded. I'm lucky to have her and to be able to call her my sister. She is pretty blunt with me too. But for the most part she keeps me laughing and helps keep my mind off the sad hard things. 

My Beautiful Sister and Me

Daddy had his portacath put in yesterday, Monday, October 15.  (You may find this inappropriate it, but it is my blog and want to remember funny things that happen and not just the bad.) So here is the text my sister, Erika, sent me when Daddy was coming off of his anesthesia.  

"Daddy's request after surgery was to go to sushi so he can have some wine! Lol.  He said but them people told me I can't have no wine... that don't make any sense does it? I just laughed. And agreed."

This is so my Daddy. And why I love that man with all my heart!

My parents went and met with the oncologist today.  Daddy will start chemo this Thursday, October 18.  I'm hoping this won't be extremely hard on him but I am bracing myself for the worst.  Please keep my family in your prayers.  Until next time...

Me & My Daddy